Should I Throw a Gender Reveal Party?

Gender reveal parties have become a pretty standard part of the prenatal line-up in the last decade or so. Pregnancy announcement, gender reveal, baby shower, birth! But are they really necessary? I hear mixed feelings about them pretty regularly in the world of pregnant mamas.

Of course they aren’t required. Throwing a separate party might feel like too much to add to your plate, or maybe you don’t like the “pink vs. blue” vibe. You may be avoiding unnecessary ultrasounds, or keeping the sex of your baby a surprise. In those cases, don’t put the pressure on yourself to have one! This is your pregnancy, your baby, and your decision.

There are a few situations, however, where you might find a gender reveal party to be a pleasant and helpful part of your pregnancy celebrations!

You just want to!

For some women, parties and color-coordinated decor just legitimately makes them happy. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that being your only reason for having a gender reveal party! You are growing a baby. You deserve all the parties!

You are having a hard time bonding with the baby.

Sometimes, a gender reveal can help solidify in your mind that this thing growing inside you is a real baby, and help promote feelings of bonding. Of course, you can always find out without the party, but the collective excitement of a group might be helpful! Either way, if you are having a hard time bonding with baby even after finding out the gender, know that it’s very normal to not have many strong positive feelings at all toward your baby until they are out, or even for some time afterwards. Lack of attachment during pregnancy in no way determines what kind of mother you will be. It’s totally normal, so try not to worry too much or force lovey-dovey feelings.

You are pregnant after a loss. 

Pregnancy after a loss can be a tricky time. Often, parents have a hard time feeling excited about the pregnancy because of the anxiety they feel. There are added layers of grief and worry on top of all the ups and downs of navigating a pregnancy. A gender reveal party can be a powerful way for expecting parents to connect with their baby and celebrate its life. It can be a brave statement of expectation in the face of intense and conflicting feelings.

Your have a lot of people who love you. 

If you are lucky enough to have a large and supportive community around you, an extra party during pregnancy can be just the project to hand to someone eager to celebrate you and your bundle. Allowing those close to you to participate in the pregnancy celebrations can be a wonderful opportunity to bring a family or community closer together. Just remember to have people lined up to support you postpartum as well!

I hope that whatever you decide, you spend your pregnancy surrounded by people who will support you, encourage you, and celebrate with you.

If you have already given birth, I would love to hear if you had a gender reveal party, and why!


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